An Arsenal FC Satire: Chronicles of the Cannon and other Stories

Chronicles of the Cannon is a medieval Arsenal FC satire. This football satire takes present-day Arsenal games and events into the 12th century.

Mister Spruce·26th November 2014

Never for once did I think in all mine years since I was ordained Chancellor of the Order of the Cannon that the dark…

Mister Spruce·19th September 2014

Thomas, awake! the drum and fife I hear; Unusual sounds! my body quakes with fear! What distant yells are those? A woman’s shriek!…

Mister Spruce·25th August 2014

We travelled to meet the Evertonians on their turf and we sought to take revenge for the plundering of our army the campaign before.…

Mister Spruce·19th August 2014

Once again I’m seated high up at the Clock End Tower pondering how the campaign of the mighty kingdom of Arsenalia might pan out.…

Mister Spruce·25th April 2014

Dwell not upon thy weariness, thy strength shall be according to the measure of thy desire… I, Monsieur Spruce, Chancellor of the Order…

Mister Spruce·27th March 2014

As he ran through the woods, he heard that haunting voice; the voice of a little child. Arsene Wenger went for top four, Arsene…

Mister Spruce·13th March 2014

And The One worked on his ‘To-Do List’. He met with an apprentice of the Sorcerer Ferguman Howard ‘Wayward’ Web and after much deliberation,…

Mister Spruce·25th February 2014

In the beginning was Arsenalia, before the rest of the kingdoms in Britannia became. And without Arsenalia was not any kingdom made that was…